The post you've all been waiting for...
I came, I saw, I survived Kids Club at church. The Grade 3's and 4's I was part of won 1st place for their age group. Many inquired about how my team had managed to score 2000+ points above the rest of their age group. I attribute this great chasm, in part, to Vienna Sausages (a.k.a. cocktail weiners) and Q-Tips.
See, this is how it all went down. I can be severely competitive at times and I've come to terms with the fact that God has maybe graced me with more "strange human tricks" than some of the people I know. For instance, I can clap and wave with one hand at the same time, I can turn my tongue into a clover shape, and I can drink things really fast. Now, there was a competition happening on the stage between the teams of the Grade 3 & 4's and they needed some leaders to get up there so I ran up to support my team.
Turns out the competition was to see who could eat 5 cocktail weiners the fastest. Our little team members were going to be feeding us the weiners and couldn't put another in until we had finished the one in our mouth. I looked at little Kyra and said,"Just keep throwing them in. I will swallow them whole." Pat was standing next to us and said,"Can you really do that?" I replied,"I'm not actually sure but I guess we'll find out." At this point we all need to take a moment and stop to realize that I'm shaking. The adrenaline has kicked in (as it does when I'm in these situations), and now I'm all shaky. According to my sorces it wasn't noticable though. Mike actually said to Heather "...and she's so calm when she does it..." and Heather informed him "No she's not!". Back to the weiners. Turns out I ate my 5 before most had finished ther first. Those pansies chewed, ha! I swear that I chewed each once or twice before I swallowed but others have debated this. What do I know? I was all hopped up on adrenaline.
Next came the Q-Tips. The game: Stuff 5. The aim: Stuff as many Q-Tips as possible in the 5 orifices of yor face (2 ears, 2 nostrils, 1 mouth). So after we've stuffed our 5 for 2 minutes, we pull them out and count. As we go down the line people are saying 60-something and 80-something and something-something. The person closest to me got 115. As they got to me, my good friend Michelle yells out "200!". I stuffed 181 Q-Tips in my face. Heather, according to her blog, was proud to be my friend that day. I'm proud that she's my friend (among other reasons) because of the amazing job she did at kids club. Way to bring it Heather. On the last day I got a certificate for my ability to stuff Q-Tips in my face. It was laminated. R says I should frame it. R says a lot of crazy things and that's why I like her so much.
After all that, I slept very well last night.
See, this is how it all went down. I can be severely competitive at times and I've come to terms with the fact that God has maybe graced me with more "strange human tricks" than some of the people I know. For instance, I can clap and wave with one hand at the same time, I can turn my tongue into a clover shape, and I can drink things really fast. Now, there was a competition happening on the stage between the teams of the Grade 3 & 4's and they needed some leaders to get up there so I ran up to support my team.
Turns out the competition was to see who could eat 5 cocktail weiners the fastest. Our little team members were going to be feeding us the weiners and couldn't put another in until we had finished the one in our mouth. I looked at little Kyra and said,"Just keep throwing them in. I will swallow them whole." Pat was standing next to us and said,"Can you really do that?" I replied,"I'm not actually sure but I guess we'll find out." At this point we all need to take a moment and stop to realize that I'm shaking. The adrenaline has kicked in (as it does when I'm in these situations), and now I'm all shaky. According to my sorces it wasn't noticable though. Mike actually said to Heather "...and she's so calm when she does it..." and Heather informed him "No she's not!". Back to the weiners. Turns out I ate my 5 before most had finished ther first. Those pansies chewed, ha! I swear that I chewed each once or twice before I swallowed but others have debated this. What do I know? I was all hopped up on adrenaline.
Next came the Q-Tips. The game: Stuff 5. The aim: Stuff as many Q-Tips as possible in the 5 orifices of yor face (2 ears, 2 nostrils, 1 mouth). So after we've stuffed our 5 for 2 minutes, we pull them out and count. As we go down the line people are saying 60-something and 80-something and something-something. The person closest to me got 115. As they got to me, my good friend Michelle yells out "200!". I stuffed 181 Q-Tips in my face. Heather, according to her blog, was proud to be my friend that day. I'm proud that she's my friend (among other reasons) because of the amazing job she did at kids club. Way to bring it Heather. On the last day I got a certificate for my ability to stuff Q-Tips in my face. It was laminated. R says I should frame it. R says a lot of crazy things and that's why I like her so much.
After all that, I slept very well last night.
posted by Lindsey and Mike at 11:38 a.m.
4 Comments:
good thing we only get to do that once a year. otherwise we might all die.
Yes, my friend - you are amazing in your abilities to do things like Stuff 5 and cocktail weenies and much, much more! I am also proud of you but not so much because of the games, just cause you pretty much rock all the time! :-)
And yes, I too am glad that Kids Club is over. Everyone in our family was in bed early last night (including me for a change).
You amaze me. Thanks for appreciating the crazy things I say. It was a great week wasn't it. It was nice actually talking to people instead of just reading up on their lives :)
I am the maker of the certificate, the one who really felt your Q-tip stuffing abilities had to go into the hall of fame!
Deanna
homeschoolblogger.com/FarmMom
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